Don't Make It Weird

by loose teeth

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about

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original songs I made while trying to put off the release of an album i thought "wasn't good enough" because I used my phone to record most of it.

well now it's good enough.

credits

released October 24, 2015

thanks, pals

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all rights reserved

about

loose teeth State College, Pennsylvania

About the Author:
Prin Eridanus is a poorly adjusted, college-aged male well equipped with satirical irony and the ability to record lofi music

don't make it weird

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Track Name: This Song Is On A Tape Cassette
Come on take a walk with me
I promise that your mama won't like it
But isn't that the point of what you're trying to do?

She keeps thinking that I should be more responsible or so and so..
I'm never really listening so I guess she's right
But I don't really have the best track record
Of good choices in my life

Say your mama "doesn't like me"
That does not surprise me, doesn't
Doesn't surprise me
Track Name: FTM Trans Rock (I Wish I Had A Dick)
Here is my voice
0 months on t
So it’s not any different that the last time you heard me
Except I came out
As someone the world didn’t think I should be
Because I wasn’t born that way

I’m living in an unforgiving world
That does not forgive the one I am
I’m living in an unforgiving world
That will punish me quite brutally for embracing what’s inside

And that would be a really good line that angsty teens would put on as their facebook status if I wasn’t insinuating one thing that they probably don’t want to insinuate at all and the thing it actually means

I wish I had a dick
I wish I had cock
I wish I had a chode
I was I had a penis

Here is my voice
0 months on t
So I still sound like the girl I am supposedly supposed to be
But I don’t want her
Because I’m not supposed to be her
I feel her in my veins she sucks the life out of me
She’s a fucking vampire!!
She’s my birthname!
Plastered over every job application even my license what the fuck!
She’s stealing my life!
So I’m stealing her voice cause it’s kind of nice

I’m living in an unforgiving world
That does not love the one I am
I’m living in an unforgiving world
That will punish me financially for embracing what’s inside
With no help form this unforgiving world I can say
I HAVE
THE BIGGEST BALLS ANY MAN HAS EVER SEEN
CAUSE I CAN SING THIS SONG EVEN WITHOUT A PHALLOPLASTY

So maybe I’m “not a man” because I wasn’t born producing massive amounts of testosterone of a prostate but hey I don’t care what you say because the truth goes just one way:

I wish I had a dick (and that I was born with it!!) x3 or so

I’m living in an unforgiving world
That does not love me
I’m living in an unforgiving world
That I will kick in the testes- just you wait!
Track Name: Stargazing With A Ticking Time Bomb (Myself)
Theres no difference between one darkness and another anymore
I can't fight it so its become to the same
I can hear it and feel it flowing through my veins
From the click of the lightswitch
To the crackheads scratching bugs beneath their skin
Thriving in withdrawl they crawl and I can feel them too who let them in

And did you know
The monsters in our heads are the same ones
That hid in our closets and underneath our beds
When we were kids and so afraid to put our feet down
Cause we could feel them waiting to take us by our ankles
And drown us in the laugher of our classmates
Or whatever broke us way back when we were so young
And not strong enough to fight back

But we grew up
Look how we grew up
From the closing of my eyelids
To the speech behind my teeth so sharp it cuts my tongue
With sarcastic phrases like
"I'm sorry, I was wrong and you've been right all along. You know it all and I'm so fucking dumb"
When really i just mean youre being a cunt
Track Name: The Stupid Money Song
I know it's not punk to need money, but I need it a lot
Track Name: I Know It's Love Because I Forgot To Take My Lithium
I treat men like candy bar wrappers
Rip em open, take the good parts and throw the rest away
I treat women like im growing flowers
Tend to them gently every day

I think men are goldfish cause you can always get more at the pet store and you dont have to cry when you flush them
I dont have a line thats applicable to girls cause they're more than household pets and should be treated with respect

I treat men like cigarettes cause theyre good until the flame goes out then i push them aside
I think girls are more like smoke, I try to hold them in as long as I can and when I exhale i don’t want to let them go even though I know theres something better on every dissipating breeze I hope they don’t forget me

Men are like shoes cause i walk all over them
Girls are like my favorite sweaters cause i never want to be without them

If i rip your heart out please know its in my nature
Foxes tend to disrespect their mates of the same gender
And im no different, i suppose
But loyalty will force me to grow
My skulk my leash my earth my pack my family my home
Loyalty will force me to grow

Romantically, with men i lack in apathy and charm
But if you took my pals from me id break your fucking arms
My skulk my leash my earth no it would never be the same if all my he/him pronoun users were to go away
With girls things have always been hard to understand
My brain does not comprehend the problems they hold in their heads
I need to talk to people whos brains work close to mine
Id lay my life on the line for my leash to be just fine
So hurt me if you will but you best believe
If you mistreat people that i love ill make sure you cant fucking breathe

If i rip your heart out please know its in my nature
Foxes tend to disrespect mates of the same gender mates
And im no different, i suppose
But loyalty will force me to grow
My skulk my leash my earth my pack my family my home
Loyalty will force me to grow
Track Name: The Thing About Ben Is, He's Moses
I hated my voice when I started smoking cigarettes
I hate my voice now that I’ve stopped smoking cigarettes
So the problem obviously wasn’t smoking cigarettes
I just hate my voice
I just thought I would tell you
I hate the curve in my spine cause I got scoliosis but my stupid spine holds me up
I hate my little fingers cause they’re fat and dumb but without them I couldn’t do much
I hate that my hands are 7in long
I hate that I have unfinished tattoos
I hate that I can rarely remember my own lyrics, that’s why I wrote this song

I hate most things about myself
I hate about 90% of myself
I hate a lot of stuff about myself and that’s why I wrote this song

I hate when compact cars park over the lines like c’mon man you’re so small do you honestly need that much room
I hate when letters don’t arrive on time cause then it’s happy birthday when its two weeks past your birthday (did you forget?)
I hate when relatives and best friends spell your name wrong it really grinds my gears
I hate when my pens run out of ink because my pens are usually very important to me
And I hate when my guitar is out of tune even though my guitar is usually out of tune
I hate when bands I love break up
Or don’t tour near me because- let’s be honest, who would willingly come here?

I hate most things about the world
I hate about 90% of the world
I hate lots of stuff about the world and that’s why I wrote this song

I hate it when you stop listening to me
You’ll look and my eyes and and all I see you hearing is

Lalalaklanslkdag
(are you listening to me)
(yeah yeah yeah dude I’m totally listening)

I hate most things about you
YES I hate about 90% of you
I hate a lot of stuff about you and that’s why I wrote this song

Lalalalalallala
I just harbor lots of negativity
All self inflected negativity
I’m a bit of a pessamist
Track Name: Hang Around
Hospitalized in group therapy he turns to me says he never wants to open up
I cant say i dont agree but theres never been a better time for talking

We hang around and hang ourselves at the thought of never getting better
We're tying our own nooses when we're supposed to be knitting sweaters
We'll hang around and hang ourselves at the thought of never getting better
Shoving so many pills down out throats its a wonder we dont choke

On all the ways we knew
We didnt fit into place
And all the sleepless nights that added up to
Broken hearts and broken dreams
And bloody arms and ripped seams and then the cover up of i just had a nose bleed

Of wearing sweaters in the summer
And hiding under covers with people we know dont love us but we fucked them anyway
We felt so fucked in the head
And we tried to end it
But we ended up in here
We got white washed walls
And the kids who throw chairs
And the state just hopes they fix us
The problems weve become

Chorus

There it goes
And another one's gone
Oh God could all 14 of us make it to 2016?
I don't think so
But here's to the hope

Here's to the hope that
We learned to tie our nooses wrong so we ended up making sweaters
That we didnt wear in the summer cause
We realised we could get better
We'll hang around
But don't hang yourself, babe
I said I'd talk you down but it didn't matter anyway
Track Name: Ode To Tinkerbell
You eat corn on the cob like a freak and I don’t know why that’s so cute to me
You eat corn on the cob so fast you eat like one a day and that’s probably not good for your digestive tract

Your ears are black and everything about you’s black except your paws cause those are grey a lil white belly
Everything about you is cute and
Oh wait yeah yoru eyes are brown so that’s not black cause it’s definitely brown
The inside of your ears is pink and you don’t like when I brush it even though you shed all the time I have to brush it

You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me
And I would punch a hawk in the face for you
If I was on a bunny walk anywhere with you
I’d punch a hawk in the face for you
And I’d also probably punch another animal, too
If it was tryin to get you

Not an animal cruelty thing
I’m just trying to protect my bunny
It’s quite important that you don’t write me up as some animal hating scum
Because this song is about love and everything is lovely
When you love your bunny

Everyone should have a bunny, or a dog, or a cat, or a mouse or a rat
But hamsters are really mean don’t get them
Everyone should have a pet that they love a lot and would do anything for them
Everybody should have a pet so they can join along when I sing this song

And say I would punch a hawk in the face for you
If I were on a bunny walk anywhere with you
I would punch in the face for you
I would also punch probably another kind of animal, too
If it was tryna hurt you

Let me clarify
I don’t usually want to punch animals
I don’t ever want to punch animals
Except when they’re tryna attack my bunny

Well, actually, one time I kicked my friends dog but that was different because it was biting me and I didn’t like that so it wouldn’t go away and it’s like the size of my foot so like everything just kinda fell into place.
Sidenote: this dog is Satan incarnate I swear it to you

I would punch a hawk in the face for you
If I were anywhere on a bunny walk with you
I would punch a hawk in the face for you
Probably another kind of animal too

Because you are my bunny
And you are so fluffy
And you are so lovely with your little almond eyes
And they say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree
But that doesn’t make sense for us
Cause you’re a bunny and I’m a guy
Anyway, the point is that the apple did fall very far from the tree
Because you’re much nicer than me, obviously you can tell in this song

Cause what I’m saying is I would punch a hawk in the face for you
This is a bunny rock and it’s my ode to Tinkerbell
She’s my bunny even though I call her bug all the time
Nobody knows her real name
And I think that’s just fine

I would punch in the face on a bunny walk
Even if it was a hawk in outer space
And we’re somehow in outer space
And we’re takin a walk and there was a hawk
And it was trying to attack you I would punch it in the face even with no gravity
I might have to throw a few practice punches but I know I’d finally get it and that’s the point:
Just to protect you

Cause I’d punch a hawk in the face for you
Even though it would probably hurt me more than it’d hurt the hawk
The point is to protect you and it’d slow it down at least

This was a really stupid song but you get excited when I play music for you
One time, you even bit my mandolin
It was kinda cute but I worried that you might have splinters in your intestines
But you didn’t because you were actually fine for like a long time after that because you’re still fine

So this is my song so I don’t have to keep making up these Christmas songs that have your name
Even though you get excited when I sing in French I don’t know French
Or not much
Just conversationally
Just barely but it makes you hoppy

That was a really bad pun
I’ve got nothing left to say about that

I would punch a hawk in the face for you
Even though you’re afraid when I laugh
I don’t blame you.
My laugh is stupid but that’s okay because you’ll kiss my nose anyway
It’s really cute

But still, you should eat your veggies
You’re the best kid even though you’re not even a kid
Cause you eat all your veggies and you never want dessert
Because the veggies are your dessert

You burrow in a hay lump and you jump jump jump jump jump
You’re so much faster than me
And I’ll run after you
No matter where or if you even want me to
Track Name: Sammy's Song
Im tiny and the trees are making fun of me
With each fallen leaf i wish i could make boat out of
To shink myself down and sail away on an air current
Fly down to the windy city and the better rename the lakes up north because they sure wont be great without you

When i get to wisconsin- i hope you dont forget this-you better be ready to go

You are so special and not only to me but especially to me

I dont have time to hang around in small towns
And i guess i really never did
I swear im gonna make it big and youll hear this song on every radio until you cant stand it
Everyone will know about your pretty brown eyes and your long blonde hair and how ill never forget a single thing you said in every little text

When i get to wisconsin ill take you away to california where the sun shines bright like your beaming face

You are so special and not only to me but especially to me

I cant wait to stand by you and hold your hand and memorize the way your skin feels on the outside of your thighs when we sit side by side and the way your hair falls in the early morning i swear this is more of a warning im gonna get romantic when you least expect it

When i get to wisconsin youre gonna know and youre gonna be ready to go
Track Name: Everyone Deserves To Die For Something
If I close my eyes for that one final time
And the gates I see aren't pearly
But instead have inscribed
"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here"
Then I guess I have nothing to fear

I know I'm safe here
And maybe this wasn't where I planned
But maybe this is where I've mean to be all along
And no matter how dark and twisted my path gets
I know that there's an ounce of good inside
Every tiny footstep

Because love me made (repeat)

You said you'd meet me at the cemetery gates
When it's a sunny day
I'm glad that you didn't arrive
Cause you said you'd meet me at the cemetery gates
If it's a sunny day
And here I am
But you're not here
And I guess that's fine

I won't try to lie, there's no use
And there's no excuses
There is no one to blame but me

But I know that I hold a little goodness in my soul
Because if something so pure
Can fit in the palm of my tiny hands
Then I know that love made me a man
So love made me who I am
And love got me just where I stand

So love made me (repeat)

And as I shake your hand
I know theres nothing to be afraid of here
Even though your hand is hot as hell

(Haha that's a pun cause you made hell
And that's where I am
And you're the devil
So I guess that's pretty cool
I'm shaking hands with the devil...)

Oh god you burned me!
But love made me..
And I guess love will make it heal

I know love made you, too
And every lawyer and politician down here
I guess love made us
Well love made me

And theres a little twisted thorn
Inside everybody's heart
But love made them
Love made me
And I the benefit of the doubt is all that I can get
Because love made me
Track Name: BONUS! Leave Weird Stains (Sheridan's Birthday Song)
I know I don't tell you enough
Just how much you mean to me
So I wish I was there and I had better words to say:

Thank you for being my home, I love you

You're getting older
You're growing up but not losing touch
Of the child in your wonderful heart

Happy birthday